"Throughout this book, I felt Bruce had a secret window into my own life and private thoughts. Many private feelings I am currently dealing with were addressed and revealed in a manner that made me feel it is not only normal, but I am truly not alone in this. I was surprised that I cried while reading it and the comfort that the words brought me. I read tons of self-help books, among other types of books, and this book actually gives me hope and things to look forward to. My tears were from the fact that I am facing the words I read. I have been getting negative feedback from outside sources and these words reassured me not to listen, keep them out of your life and do what is right. The section on the other home/parent opened my eyes and freed me. I did not go into reading this book thinking it would help me on such a deep emotional level." ~Dorothy Justice, Vice Chair-Community Action Partnership

October 12, 2012

Preparing For Change In Your Life

"Nothing quite prepares us for change, accept change itself- it helps knowing taking the first step is the beginning of something bigger." -excerpt Preparing for change in your life.
Many things may make you stare into open space wishing and hoping, maybe praying for renewed strength. You may feel stuck and can’t move, finding yourself immobile against this imaginary tide that strikes you. Have you ever stood in the ocean waiting for a large wave to breach only to have it hit you and push you over? Sometimes life feels this way. Change is inevitable.

Preparing for a life change may mean just becoming aware and accepting change is necessary. Have you or do you want to create changes? You may not even know what the change is or needs to be.  You just know moving on would be easier if you could just release or sidestep the unavoidable fears and emotions.

Did you ever have that dream where you can’t move? You try to move your arm or leg and it wont go! As if someone or something is pinning you down. Then you wake up confused to the weird and
awkwardness as you display your moving part. I hated that dream. I used to have that dream but not anymore. I changed my life.

How do you prepare for something when you are not sure what needs to be changed? Maybe you already know and choose not to confront or acknowledge the issue. What got you to this realization is perhaps pending or post divorce stress, complacency in your marriage or relationships, lackluster career, or your determination to change your own personal image and outlook among other things. Maybe it’s all of the above. All in all, it’s your life and it’s holding you down. Time to turn a new leaf.

You may be just going through the motions in your life and it’s disheartening. You know this, but you still do it. Why? Maybe the change just means improving what you already have.  You may want a new outlook on your existing surroundings. Change has many forms- its how you feel in the end is the desired outcome.

You wake up one day and determine you want to be happier. The pursuit of happiness is a well-documented quest of why, but how? We don’t need a Congressional document to understand it’s our God given right to be happy. He wants this for you and has his own document. Wouldn’t it be remarkable if you could feel and drive with purpose in your life?

It may look challenging on the surface, but with some soul searching and closer examination, I made change. Change is an acceptable occurrence. Once upon a time I was an engineer, then jumped to the business side of the house in providing business analysis until I gained the confidence to start my own company doing the same.

All the while during this process I: divorced, worked through the challenges of post divorce life, primarily raised four beautiful little girls, maintained my own personal life with three lengthy significant relationships (excluding another marriage and prompt annulment) until my recent engagement proposal to my beautiful fiancé.

Now, I’m sharing the wealth of knowledge I gained from all aspects of my life in a new book to be published 2013. I’ve changed again and I’m showing others how to rebuild…. And change. I’m not waiting for life to tell me when to change. I’m here to tell you the same.

Nothing quite prepares us for change, except change itself- it helps knowing taking the first step is the beginning of something bigger. Challenge plus change is growth in my opinion. I want to grow and be a better man always. Growth is good even when you can’t see it, but feel it.

The things, which will undoubtedly force most of us to change, are unfortunate- tragedy, divorce, loss, and unemployment are the common ones. Why can’t we instigate change in ourselves when we already know it’s necessary- before life dictates or hands us this lesson and we are unprepared.

We go though the motions knowing we are sinking, but until we dip below water level we won’t make a move to jump for air- to create change. Sometimes someone else makes the decision for us. Life can seem unjust- if only we could see through the murky waters and find our growth instantaneously. But then what would we have learned? In retrospect, you may not have realized you were suffocating before you went under. Breathe!

It’s when you are pushed against the wall and forced to make decisions that you will accept change as I did with my divorce. Why wait for that disaster? Why wait for when sink or swim are your only options? If you know you are running on a flat surface or you see the ground coming up on you, it’s time to take a renewed perspective on your situation.

Coasting can be fun when you want to sit back, get a good view and enjoy the scenery. You may also justify this type of complacency to absorb and reap the benefits of your hard work, accomplishments, and rewards. What happens when you have been viewing the same scenery for some time now?

If you let the road guide you or let the obstacles in your path steer you then life is dictating you instead of the other way around. Likewise, if you let the wind under your extended unflappable wings maintain your direction- you’ll inevitably have to come down soon, right?

I’m not opposed to letting Devine energy guide me. Sometimes I rely on letting things unfold in front of me when I don’t know the answer. If I don’t know the right direction at a crossroad, I’ll wait and feel a push and go with it. It's what is in between the crossroads that is my responsibility! I create these crossroads by moving, improving, creating, and changing. When coming to a juncture, I may let destiny show me its course. 

Always having options in my life is what’s important. Change is inevitable. Preparing for change is accepting change is necessary and having courage to move forward. If you do the work, you’ll find your way. Opportunity will present itself- it does come knocking if you are listening.  Don’t wait for change to come to you. Take the steps now, today, to improve your life and therefore those around you who matter most. 

How do you prepare for something you are unsure?  Take the first steps and let it unfold.

Bruce Buccio resides in Colorado, USA, is a Rebuilding Coach and Expert and soon to be published Author. Today, he writes primarily inspired by experiences raising his children, but also writes about inspiration, growth, and love.

-photo credit: GollyGforce/ Flickr

© 2012- Bruce Buccio, Like Me! Share My Message!

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